Tag Archives: islamic

Your Daily Muslim: Abd al-Jalil al-Karouri

The Islamic Alex Jones

The Islamic Alex Jones

“Why shouldn’t we call [Barack Obama] by the name [Hussein], which belongs to us? …It wouldn’t be a mistake for our media to call him President Hussein.”

Sudanese Islamic cleric Abd al-Jalil al-Karouri is the latest in a long line of nutty Islamic conspiracy theorists. In a recent sermon, he is quoted as saying that the recent earthquake in Iran which damaged the country’s nuclear capabilities (hallelujah) was caused by a western nation.

Apparently the US can now cause earthquakes halfway across the world. Good to know. That said, al-Karouri’s logic behind his assertion was this: “People know who is responsible for earthquakes. It is God… The so-called ‘earthquake-war’ has begun. The industrialized countries have the capacity to make bombs that impact the Earth’s crust and core, causing earthquakes.” An Iranian Islamic cleric, Kazem Sedighi, said women not wearing the veil (burqa) brought about earthquakes as a sign of anger from God. Neither cleric made any mention of tectonic instability. As for bombs reaching the Earth’s core, well, they’d have to get through thousands of miles of mantle first. al-Karouri needs to complete his elementary-school education before trying to talk about science.

al-Karouri then reached Alex Jones-esque levels of craziness when he blamed Israel for the Boston marathon bombings. “When North Korea stopped manufacturing buses, it started making nuclear warheads. Today, North Korea poses a threat to America. America might be drawn into an historic war, a war between Communism and capitalism. This is precisely what Israel does not want. Israel wants the war to be between America and the ‘primitive’ Arabs, and that is why the bombs were ‘primitive.’” At least al-Karouri recognizes the civilizational and intellectual shortcomings of Palestine and other middle eastern countries. However, those shortcomings have nothing to do with race but entirely with religion; Islam opposes change and education since education empowers people that need to be kept blind in the dark for the 7th-century ideology to prosper.

“It is written in the Qur’an that at one point the Jews were transformed into apes in a city called Eilat, which the Jews now occupy. They became apes.” An ape has a greater intellectual capacity than al-Karouri if he actually believes such fiction as rapid reverse evolution to be true.

al-Karouri’s batshit insanity and anti-Semitism don’t stop there. He claims that Jews masterminded the 9/11 attacks, a claim so ridiculously false it even inspired its own internet meme. “We consider this to be a Jewish conspiracy. 4,000 Jews were absent from work in this usury center – these two buildings in Manhattan were the World Usury Center. 4,000 Jews were absent from work, so that 4,000 Americans would die.” Anything non-Muslim, including non-halal economics, is fair game to be viciously attacked by Muslims without backlash from their sycophantic leftist buddies.

Now, here’s some more food for thought from al-Karouri on Barack Hussein Obama: “[Obama] has ideological roots, because his father is one of ours, and his religion, originally, is our religion. He has a longing for these roots. Otherwise, he would not display such a yearning.”

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Your Daily Muslim: Muhammad Abdul-Malik al-Zoghbi

The placement of the tablecloth on the head denotes one's lack of mental stability.

The placement of the tablecloth on the head denotes one’s lack of mental stability.

Some people have no idea how dirty what they’re saying actually is. Egyptian Sunni Islamic cleric Muhammad Abdul-Malik al-Zoghbi is one of those people. In a televised speech, he unintentionally discussed the early practice of gay BDSM by an ancient Pharaoh as part of a tirade against Jews.

“[Pharaoh] would ride a Jew as one might ride a donkey… Pharaoh would ride on his back, his legs dangling on either side. Sometimes, he would ride him sidesaddle. He would grab him by the collar, and lead him: Giddyup… He would ride him like a donkey because a donkey he is.” Wow, if that isn’t describing gay sex, I don’t know what is. What’s funnier is that al-Zoghbi is oblivious to the true nature of what he’s saying in an effort to insult Jews, but is really making himself seem like a dirty old man. And why are Jews donkeys anyway? They aren’t asses, unlike Muslims.

The anti-Semitism doesn’t end there. In another speech, al-Zoghbi is quoted as saying: “…wherever the Jews may be found, they wallow in mud and spread corruption.” He also called Jews the “masters of terrorism.” Yes, Jews are the masters of terrorism, because it’s Jews across the world who are screaming “Yahweh Akbar,” blowing themselves up in crowded places, and beheading non-Jews.

Al-Zoghbi had this to say about Shiite Muslims: “May Allah cut your tongue out! May he freeze the blood in your veins! May he inflict you with cancer and allow you no reprieve… Allah, strike them with all sorts of disease, afflictions and pain! Allah, strike them with cancer! Allah, let your prophet overpower them! Allah destroy them! Allah destroy them! Allah destroy them! Allah destroy the criminals who challenge the noble prophet!” If that’s what Muslims think should happen to their fellow Muslims just for having a few different beliefs, imagine the kind of torture they have in mind for us kuffar (infidels)…

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Your Daily Muslim: Kabiru Sokoto

A face not even a mother could love.

A face not even a mother could love.

Nigerian Muslim Kabiru Sokoto is a midget whose face looks like it received plastic surgery at the hands of a trash compactor. Fraught with self-doubt and low self-esteem due to his hideous visage, he felt an increasing need to prove himself to society and large and to his invisible best friend, a psychopath named Allah. Sokoto is a member of Boko Haram, Nigeria’s leading group for sadistic Islamic assholes who want to take the entire world back to the 7th century. He hatched a plan to target Christians on one of their most sacred holidays: Christmas.

Sokoto walked around the St. Theresa Catholic Church in the city of Madalla to scout the location. He decided it was a suitable target, so he and his Boko Haram buddies prepared some explosives. One of the militants placed the device in the church, then detonated it during a Christmas mass, killing 37.

Shortly after the blast, the idiot was captured. With the help of a fellow Boko Haram member, he escaped from holding, where he undoubtedly would have been made into the prison bitch. Fortunately, however, Nigerian authorities tracked him down a month later and threw him into a more secure cell. He has been charged with the bombing and is awaiting sentencing.

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Your Daily Muslim: Hassan Abujihaad

He should wage jihad against his waistline, not the US...

He should wage jihad against his waistline, not the US…

Anyone who converts to Islam and chooses to put ‘jihad’ in their name, however misspelled, is obviously up to no good. US Navy sailor Paul Hall had grown tired of getting confused with second-rate rapper Paul Wall, so he changed his name to Hassan Abujihaad upon his conversion to Islam. Unlike many Muslim converts who don’t have their jihad planned out upon conversion, Abujihaad already knew how he was going to serve Allah, aside from bending over for him five times a day.

You have to be fairly unintelligent and/or gullible to convert to Islam, a religion which advocates wife-beating, child marriage, and unusually violent hatred of all those who don’t believe in it. That considered, Abujihaad’s unfamiliarity with how the internet works should come as no surprise. He had converted to Islam after visiting an Islamic bookstore in England, and that was where he made his first connections in the Islamic community, which he maintained through frequent use of online forums. However, he didn’t use a proxy to hide his IP address when talking with his fellow mujahideen (jihadis.) It wasn’t long before he betrayed the US, to which he had sworn an oath as a Navy sailor.

When some of his online friends asked him about the positions of US Navy ships, Abujihaad happily divulged that confidential information. He also purchased videos of jihad attacks and spoke words of praise about Osama bin Laden and the attack on the USS Cole. A while later, Abujihaad left the Navy, and felt confident no one would learn of how he had betrayed his country. However, when the FBI began investigating terror links related to that bookstore and the jihadi forum it was connected to, they immediately found evidence of Abujihaad’s treason. He was taken into custody and sentenced to 10 years for divulging classified information.

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Your Daily Muslim: Abdelkader Eljanabi

Abdelkader Eljanabi

Abdelkader Eljanabi

55-year-old UK Muslim Abdelkader Eljanabi just couldn’t resist. Despite everything he had been taught about resisting temptation, the allure of the creature’s tender flesh was too strong for him. He couldn’t help but indulge himself, despite the fact that he was in the bathroom of a shopping center and the tempting creature was a 14-year-old boy who didn’t consent.

Eljanabi, being old and arthritic, enlisted the help of one of his fellow gay pedos, Alex Wilson-Fletcher, to help stalk and contain the victim. The pair followed the teen from a local LGBT youth center to the public bathroom, where Eljanabi began ferociously cruising the boy, ogling him up and down. The teen was rightly freaked out and tried to move away from the pervert. Wilson-Fletcher then appeared behind the boy, allowing Eljanabi to grab him. “Come with us, you’re going to do anything we say and if you try to run away we will catch you,” Eljanabi told the frightened 14-year-old.

Eljanabi and Wilson-Fletcher directed the teen into a bathroom at a department store, where they forced him to munch on their rancid genitals. Eljanabi then raped the boy, like Muslim men do to young boys all across the Middle East as a “cultural practice.” By Islamic logic, the teen should’ve worn a burqa so he wouldn’t be considered at fault for the rape by inciting temptation in his attackers.

Eljanabi and Wilson-Fletcher have been arrested and charged with the crime. UPDATE April 29 – Eljanabi and Wilson-Fletcher have both been convicted!

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Your Daily Muslim: Samira Ahmed Jassim al-Azzawi

...is that a tranny?

…is that a tranny?

Samira Ahmed Jassim al-Azzawi was well past her first midlife crisis, and after going through menopause, decided it was time to have another. The Iraqi Muslim, dressed in the traditional Islamic ninja costume, made it her mission to recruit other women to her newfound cause: jihad. She crafted a new image for herself (without Botox), giving herself the nickname “Umm al-Mumineen,” or “the mother of believers.”

Not being the sharpest tool in the shed, al-Azzawi enlisted some of her mujahideen (jihadi) male friends from terror group Ansar al-Sunnah to help in her endeavor. al-Azzawi talked to the women and formed relationships with them, then took them to an orchard held by the men. At the orchard, the women were trained in the ways of the mujahideen. al-Azzawi instructed her friends to rape the women who were hesitant. After the rapes, she would approach the women and tell them that, in order to escape the shame they had brought upon themselves by being raped, they would need to blow themselves up for Allah. The traditional Islamic ninja costume is great for fat chicks who want to hide their spare tire(s), but is also great for bombers who want to conceal explosives around their bodies.

Now, if you’re sitting here with your jaw on the table, I’m right there with you. This story is all sorts of f**ked up. Why would anyone think women should feel guilty for being raped?! And why is suicide the only solution?! That’s Islamic morality for you…

al-Azzawi was captured after one of her recruits’ bombing attempts was thwarted. She was interrogated by local police and admitted to having recruited over 80 women for jihad. She said that she had masterminded 28 terror attacks that were carried out according to plan. There is no word whether or not the orchard at which her recruits were trained is still in use by mujahideen.

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Your Daily Muslim: Salma Kabal

The Nazgul from Lord of the Rings are frequently seen in the Islamic world

The Nazgul from Lord of the Rings are frequently seen in the Islamic world

Pregnant UK Muslim Salma Kabal is the definition of clingy. Despite the fact that her husband Ashik Ali had left her to prepare to wage jihad, she continually begged him to return to help raise the child she’s carrying. It is unknown what the offspring of a human and a Nazgul like Kabal would look like; perhaps media coverage will show the baby once it is born.

Ali, realizing his wife wasn’t even human after several disturbing and painful sex sessions, decided he needed to seek forgiveness for his actions from Allah while staying away from his wife. To do so, he decided to plan a suicide bombing with a few of his friends. Kabal was deeply saddened by her human conquest’s departure, and pined for his return. She managed to track Ali down, and the two had an honest heart-to-whatever-the-Nazgul-have about their future. Ali told her about his plans to wage jihad, and she supported him. The dumbass didn’t even think her husband was trying to blow himself up to get some virgin vagina, since Nazgul sex is apparently unbearable. She still held on to the hope that they had a future together.

Kabal, to get closer to her husband, volunteered to join him and his associates in their jihad. Their conversations, however, were being recorded by British authorities. Instead of trying to convince Ali to return to their home and start a family together, she felt obligated to stand by him no matter what kinds of bad decisions he was making. She was completely aware of his attempt to create what he claimed would be “bigger than 9/11.” She didn’t contact anyone else about it, not her friends, not authorities… apparently saving her marriage was more important to her than saving thousands of innocent people. Then again, they were infidels, and we all know how highly Muslims think of infidels.

Ali and his associates were arrested on terrorism charges. Kabal has been charged as a conspirator for not contacting the police despite her knowledge of the terror plot for nearly two years.

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Your Daily Muslim: Wayne Whallid Parnell

Islam, before and after. In addition to being an atrocity against women, Islam is also an atrocity against proper grooming.

Islam, before and after. In addition to being an atrocity against women, Islam is also an atrocity against proper grooming.

South African professional cricket player Wayne (conversion name Whallid) Parnell isn’t exactly the kind of person I normally feature on here – for one, his hair isn’t gray and/or falling out, for two, he’s a public figure who isn’t involved in politics or clergy. Why is he on here then? He’s a prime example of Islamic hypocrisy.

Parnell converted to Islam in 2011, likely as a stunt for publicity. Ever since, he has drawn a massive Muslim following simply because he converted to Islam, akin to how celebrities who come out as LGBT automatically garner a gay following. After his conversion, he has refused to wear jerseys with logos of alcohol brands on them because substance abuse is against his religion. What his Muslim following would be shocked to find out, however, is that Parnell is a lying hypocrite.

Now playing for a cricket team in India, Parnell decided he wanted to have a little more fun than his religion allowed him to. At a party, he and numerous others used cocaine, MDMA, and cannabis. When the party was raided by police, he was apprehended. He denies any wrongdoing, though he tested positive for the presence of drugs in his system. Parnell also kissed a dog, which none of his Muslim following would be pleased to see – dogs are considered “ritually unclean” in Islam, like pigs. Sorry, Wayne, or Whallid, or Wall-E, or whatever it is you want to be called. The cover has been blown on your little publicity stunt.

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Your Daily Muslim: Tamerlan Tsarnaev (DAILY DOUBLE)

Tamerlan Tsarnaev trying to out-gay everyone else at his boxing club

Tamerlan Tsarnaev trying to out-gay everyone else at his boxing club

As if the media hadn’t already been covering these Muslims enough, here’s another story about them. Tamerlan and Dzhokhar Tsarnaev are brothers originally from predominantly-Islamic Chechnya in southern Russia. They came to the US five years ago and, much to liberals’ dismay, showed how completely unwilling Muslims are to integrate into western society.

In the five years they’ve been here, the brothers hatched and executed a plot to bomb the Boston Marathon on April 15, 2013. Three were killed in the blasts. Tamerlan spent his free time boxing (what is it with Muslims and having anger issues?) and Dzhokhar spent his free time online. Before waging jihad, Tamerlan was interviewed by a local photojournalist about his life and values.

“There are no values anymore… people can’t control themselves,” Tamerlan said, when discussing modern popular culture. “God said no alcohol.” It’s quite possible that Tamerlan said that when he found out everyone in the west could drink him under the table, which was an embarrassing moment. And Tamerlan really has no right to criticize anyone’s “values” – we aren’t the ones blowing people up because our imaginary friends tell us to. In the same interview, he said he didn’t like to take his shirt off during his boxing training because it could lead others to temptation. With a butterface like his, no one’s gonna want to tap that anyway, so shirt on or off is irrelevant.

“I don’t have a single American friend,” Tamerlan continued. “I don’t understand them.” His lack of comprehension of our culture is understandable – to a seventh-century savage hell-bent on destroying the infidel, western culture is far too advanced to be understood. However, even after having spent five years here, he didn’t even think that maybe his values were the ones that needed to be examined and changed so he could integrate into the larger society.

So now here we are today. Tamerlan’s splattered remains are in a morgue somewhere and his brother is on the run after discharging explosives at police. Authorities have warned that Dzhokhar is armed and dangerous.

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