Your Daily Muslim: Yousuf al-Badri

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No caption needed.

Egyptian Islamic cleric Yousuf al-Badri is a prime example of what happens when a Muslim becomes senile. Resembling Santa Claus after a disastrous makeover, al-Badri has preached against all sorts of things ranging from Israel to lingerie. You know what they say, he who doth protest… I bet there’s some real kinky shit in al-Badri’s closet.

On lingerie: al-Badri believes that stores that advertise women’s lingerie or sell women’s clothing in the same section as men’s garments undermine “cultural legitimacy.” On the other hand, those stores do give pervs like him the ability to look at lingerie without being looked at as that creepy old dude who fondles the bras and mannequins in Victoria’s Secret.

On female genital mutilation: Like any dirty old man, al-Badri loves to talk about vaginas. As part of a religious committee ruling on the legality of female circumcision, al-Badri stated: “I urge you, for the love of God, not to leave Islam to the mercy of those who want to make licit or illicit, as they wish, principles which have been in place for 14 centuries.” People also believed the world was flat for centuries, but that principle has since been proven wrong. Islam, take a hint from the civilized world and stop mutilating girls.

On marital rape: “In Islam, the marriage contract is a contract of pleasure, which allows both the husband and wife to derive pleasure from one another. So if deriving pleasure lies at the core of the contract, how can we possibly call it rape when a husband derives pleasure from his wife?!” He then went on to say that if a wife refuses her husband’s sexual advances, she will incur the wrath of Allah upon her. Of all the crazy shit I’ve heard Islamic clerics say, that probably takes the cake. Watch for yourself – it will make you sick to your stomach. Think of how many women around the world are in marriages like al-Badri describes…

On Israel and the US: “The nuclear bombs of Iran and Pakistan should be bombs against Israel. We shall chant as we did in Tehran: ‘Death to Israel. Death to America.'” Liberals need to wake up and smell the jihad (it really stinks ’cause jihadis bathe less often than even liberals do!)

On Maher el-Gowhary, a former Muslim who converted to Christianity: al-Badri called for the “shedding of his blood.” This resulted in a mob surrounding him and attempting to behead him. el-Gowhary and his family live in hiding due to numerous fatwas from batshit insane clerics.

7 comments on “Your Daily Muslim: Yousuf al-Badri

  1. […] saying that either a woman is forced to have sex with her husband (which is rape, contrary to some Islamists’ beliefs), or she will get beaten. Needless to say, Islam treats women like shit. Anyone who says […]

  2. […] Yousuf al-Badri, best known for his Santa Claus impersonation, has been up to no good since he was originally featured on YDM. Being the attention whore he is, he’s given interviews regarding Islamic teachings and […]

  3. […] absolutely unfair. However, Islam doesn’t see it that way. Many of the religion’s leading scholars claim there is no such thing as marital rape. Qur. 2:223 is cited as their justification for this […]

  4. “We will convey our deep appreciation for the Islamic Faith, which has done so much over so many centuries to shape the world for the better, including my own country,

    Barrack Hussein Obama, President of United States of America


    When Barack Obama was a 19-year-old student at Occidental College, he published two poems in the Spring 1982 issue of Occidental’s literary magazine, Feast. One is the cringe-worthy “Underground” about “apes that eat figs.” The other poem, “Pop,” is much more interesting, biographical, and disturbing.

    Sitting in his seat, a seat broad and broken
    In, sprinkled with ashes,
    Pop switches channels, takes another
    Shot of Seagrams, neat, and asks
    What to do with me, a green young man
    Who fails to consider the
    Flim and flam of the world, since
    Things have been easy for me;
    I stare hard at his face, a stare
    That deflects off his brow;
    I’m sure he’s unaware of his
    Dark, watery eyes, that
    Glance in different directions,
    And his slow, unwelcome twitches,
    Fail to pass.
    I listen, nod,
    Listen, open, till I cling to his pale,
    Beige T-shirt, yelling,
    Yelling in his ears, that hang
    With heavy lobes, but he’s still telling
    His joke, so I ask why
    He’s so unhappy, to which he replies…
    But I don’t care anymore, cause
    He took too damn long, and from
    Under my seat, I pull out the
    Mirror I’ve been saving; I’m laughing,
    Laughing loud, the blood rushing from his face
    To mine, as he grows small,
    A spot in my brain, something
    That may be squeezed out, like a
    Watermelon seed between
    Two fingers.
    Pop takes another shot, neat,
    Points out the same amber
    Stain on his shorts that I’ve got on mine, and
    Makes me smell his smell, coming
    From me; he switches channels, recites an old poem
    He wrote before his mother died,
    Stands, shouts, and asks
    For a hug, as I shrink, my
    Arms barely reaching around
    His thick, oily neck, and his broad back; ‘cause
    I see my face, framed within
    Pop’s black-framed glasses
    And know he’s laughing too.

    Muttaqi (God-fearing) monkeys
    Narrated ‘Amr bin Maimun: During the pre-lslamic period of ignorance I saw a she-monkey surrounded by a number of monkeys. They were all stoning it, because it had committed illegal sexual intercourse. I too, stoned it along with them.
    Sahih Bukhari 5:58:188




    Sahih Muslim Book 08. N 3371Marriage

    Chapter: Al-Azl (incomplete sexual intercourse): Coitus Interruptus.

    Abu Sirma said to Abu Sa’id al Khadri (Allah he pleased with him): O Abu Sa’id, did you hear Allah’s Messenger (May peace be upon him) mentioning al-‘azl? He said: Yes, and added: We went out with Allah’s Messenger (May peace be upon him) on the expedition to the Bi’l-Mustaliq and took captive some excellent Arab women;

    and we desired them, for we were suffering from the absence of our wives, (but at the same time) we also desired ransom for them.
    So we decided to have sexual intercourse with them but by observing ‘azl (Withdrawing the male sexual organ before emission of semen to avoid conception). But we said: We are doing an act whereas Allah’s Messenger is amongst us; why not ask him?

    So we asked Allah’s Messenger (May peace be upon him), and he said: It does not matter if you do not do it, for every soul that is to be born up to the Day of Resurrection will be born.




    Al-‘Azl, (العزل) also known as coitus interruptus, is the practice of having sexual intercourse with a woman but withdrawing the penis before ejaculation. Apparently al-‘Azl with female captives and slaves was a pretty important topic for Muhammad and his companions as evidenced by the abundance of Hadith material on the subject.
    Practiced during Muhammad’s lifetime
    Narrated Jabir: We used to practice coitus interruptus during the lifetime of Allah’s Apostle .
    Sahih Bukhari 7:62:135
    Narrated Jabir: We used to practice coitus interrupt us while the Quran was being revealed. Jabir added: We used to practice coitus interruptus during the lifetime of Allah’s Apostle while the Quran was being Revealed.
    Sahih Bukhari 7:62:136
    When RAPING your captive, it’s better if you do not pull out at the end

    Narrated Abu Said Al-Khudri: that while he was sitting with Allah’s Apostle he said, “O Allah’s Apostle! We get female captives as our share of booty, and we are interested in their prices, what is your opinion about coitus interruptus(RAPE WITHOUT PREGNANCY)?” The Prophet said, “Do you really do that? It is better for you not to PULL OUT. No soul that which Allah has destined to exist, but will surely come into existence.”

    Sahih Bukhari 3:34:432

    Abu Said said, “We went with Allah’s Apostle, in the Ghazwa of Barli Al-Mustaliq and we captured some of the ‘Arabs as captives, and the long separation from our wives was pressing us hard and we wanted to practice coitus interruptus. We asked Allah’s Apostle (whether it was permissible). He said, “It is better for you not to do so. No soul, (that which Allah has) destined to exist, up to the Day of Resurrection, but will definitely come, into existence.”
    Sahih Bukhari 3:46:718

    We went out with Allah’s Apostle for the Ghazwa of Banu Al-Mustaliq and we received captives from among the Arab captives and we desired women and celibacy became hard on us and we loved to do coitus interruptus. ………
    We asked (him) about it and he said, “It is better for you not to PULL OUT, for if any soul (till the Day of Resurrection) is predestined to exist, it will exist.”
    Sahih Bukhari 5:59:459

    Narrated Abu Said Al-Khudri: That during the battle with Bani Al-Mustaliq they (Muslims) captured females and wanted sexual relation with them without impregnating them. So they asked the Prophet about coitus interruptus. He said, “It is better that you leave it in, for Allah has written whom He is going to create till the Day of Resurrection.” Qaza’a said, “I heard Abu Sa’id saying that the Prophet said, ‘No soul is ordained to be created but Allah will create it.”
    Sahih Bukhari 9:93:506

  5. […] English law, it is not permissible for a man to rape his wife in sharia law.” Actually, leading Islamic scholars/clerics would beg to differ on that last part – many believe there’s […]

  6. […] another call-in show, Zarrar and sheikh Yousuf al-Badri got a bizarre call they were a bit blindsided by. Upon hearing the caller explain that his wife had […]

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