Damian Clairmont totally doesn’t have creepy eyes. At all.

“The first thing a mother says is, ‘what did I do wrong? How could this be my son?'”

Those are the words of Clairmont’s mother. Born and raised in a non-Muslim Canadian household, Clairmont had a somewhat normal childhood. He was athletic and had a decent group of friends before being diagnosed with bipolar disorder and dropping out of high school. Islam does tend to attract the mentally unstable, and this case serves as an example of that phenomenon.

Everything started to spiral downhill when Clairmont picked up a 7th-century child porn fairytale known as the Qur’an. Finding that the passages about Muhammad molesting 9-year-old Aisha turned him on, Clairmont kept reading. Soon, he was a full-blown Muslim, and took the name of Mustafa al-Gharib. It wasn’t long before he had distanced himself from his kuffar family and friends.

At age 22, Clairmont finally moved out of his mother’s house in a desperate attempt to finally get laid – by traveling to Syria without informing her. Of course, he wasn’t there as a relief worker. He wanted to get his jihad on so he could receive 72 virgins and finally ditch his v-card. he periodically contacted his mother from Syria. In their conversations, he reminded her coldly that Canadians were “scum” and that they were sinners who didn’t deserve to be on this Earth. What a tolerant and peaceful religion!

Now, Clairmont’s no longer on this Earth. He was killed while fighting alongside Islamist terror group Jabhat al-Nusra. Before he died, however, he left a rather grim message speaking of his coming “martyrdom.” In that message, Clairmont wrote:

“The benefit for myself in terms of worldly life is most certainly back in Canada, where I could see my family, indulge in fornication and infidelity legally and limitlessly, and stagger around poisoned on intoxicants, and then lie to myself and the world about freedom and how fantastic it is. After all, that is what we were conditioned to believe since our school days, was it not?”

What’s so wrong about staggering around on intoxicants? It’s pretty fun, as is fornication. In fact, it’s my 25th birthday tomorrow, and after work, that is exactly what I’m gonna do. I’m 100% certain I’m gonna be having more fun than Mr. Six-feet-under-the-ground-with-six-holes-in-his-chest-for-Allah since I’m not gonna be with a virgin who has no idea how to have sex. Also, I have a little surprise for y’all on here tomorrow… stay tuned!