4 Comments

Your Daily Muslim #513: Malika Zarrar

Malika Zarrar's sex face

Malika Zarrar’s sex face

Dr. Malika Zarrar is an expert on Islamic law at Egypt’s al-Azhar University. An aging woman with a fiery personality, Zarrar is best known for her sharp wit. Unlike most of her colleagues at al-Azhar, Zarrar vehemently opposes female genital mutilation, claiming there is no basis for it in Islam.

That first paragraph made it seem like Zarrar isn’t all that bad… so why did she end up on YDM? Because she’s just as crazy as every other Muslim on here. When asked about a sheikh’s rather lurid interpretation of scriptures about jannah (Islamic heaven) and the 72 virgins therein, Zarrar made a completely reasonable demand – well, reasonable by Muslim standards, at least. “They let such a person make a mockery of the Book of Allah? … He should be executed.” Yep, execution for not getting certain details about fictional virgins correct. Totally a logical course of action, Dr. Zarrar.

Zarrar is an activist against female genital mutilation, having undergone the procedure herself at a young age. However, some of her reasoning against the procedure is a bit… flawed. “It has been scientifically proven that all whores have been circumcised.” Uhh, what? Either Zarrar has been staring at a lot of prostitutes’ vaginas or she’s been hitting her head a little too hard during her five daily headbanging rituals. That has to be one of the most absurd statements made by a Muslim on this site.

Being the outspoken firebrand she is, Zarrar does not shy away from issues of sexuality. The first quote is a bit strange but remains respectable: “Sexual relations between a man and a woman is a form of worship.” If I were straight, that would be a religion I could get down with (no pun intended.) However, her definition of “sexual relations” is very narrow. Her reaction to a fatwa that permitted oral stimulation (not even full-blown oral sex… hey, another pun) was rather immediate and extreme: “What is this audacity? There is no shame left!” Needless to say, Muslims’ sex lives must be pretty boring.

On another call-in show, Zarrar and sheikh Yousuf al-Badri got a bizarre call they were a bit blindsided by. Upon hearing the caller explain that his wife had caught him and his brother having sex, Zarrar cringed and double facepalmed. al-Badri looked intrigued yet altogether flummoxed. Zarrar’s epic facepalm of disbelief continued as the caller detailed his later sexual encounter with his sister-in-law, which resulted in pregnancy. Zarrar was left speechless by the absurdity of the situation. It is unknown if she offered any advice to the caller, or if she just held her head in her hands for the remainder of the call.

4 comments on “Your Daily Muslim #513: Malika Zarrar

  1. Her face! I was just bursting with laughter.

  2. Soo-prize butt-seks-ki!!!

  3. Wtf is your problem? This website is just fucking sad. A whole website dedicated to tarnishing Islam loll..good luck with that 🙂

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