Hisham Barakat

The legalization of gay marriage has been sweeping across the United States, with more states joining the movement for equality by the month. However, the Islamic world remains obstinate and steadfast against same-sex marriages thanks to their seventh-century religious beliefs. Recently, some Egyptians held an unofficial gay wedding ceremony. The wedding was filmed, which was bad news for many of those in attendance, not just the two grooms. When identified by government officials, eight men who attended the wedding were arrested.

Egypt’s prosecutor general, Hisham Barakat, who has previously prosecuted and frozen the assets of ousted Muslim Brotherhood members, had some rather unpleasant words about the wedding. Barakat’s office released a statement sayng the wedding was “shameful to Allah” and “offensive to public morals.” You know what’s actually shameful? The fact that some people have to live their lives in fear, unable to express their love thanks to the savage beliefs of Muslims. As for offending public morals – as if Islam doesn’t do that every day, with its ridiculous ninja costumes and barbaric sharia punishments (hudud.)

Speaking of punishments, what happened to the eight men who were arrested at the wedding? They were “tested” for homosexuality upon arrest. The exact process of this test is unknown, but it is believed to involve aggressive anal probing. The men were each sentenced to three years behind bars for “inciting debauchery.” Uhh, it’s a wedding. That’s like the tamest thing a group of gay guys could do. If Muslims can’t even handle that, there may just be no hope.