Karim Kazane

Despite pigs having been deemed unclean by his religion, UK Muslim Karim Kazane appears to be trying his damnedest to look like one. The 23-year-old hamplanet went out to a restaurant called Zizzi’s, where he made sure to order a pizza that fell within his religion’s absurd dietary code. While the restaurant staff should have done the humane thing and served him a salad instead, he received a pizza and began gorging himself.

Halfway through the meal, Kazane allegedly discovered a piece of pepperoni in the pizza. Instead of reacting like a normal person and removing it, the Muslim decided to make an attempt for the Muslim Jackpot. When interviewed about his LOLsuit, Kazane commented: “Normally you’re in control of yourself, you’re Muslim. I know that as a Muslim you know what you’re doing. I’ve never done it because of my religion and they [Zizzi’s] took that away from me.” No one took anything away from you. There may have been an innocent error in your order, not some sort of grievous blow to your personal security. Of course, Muslims can’t recognize the difference between mountains and molehills, hence half the pieces on this site.

“I have lost trust in eating out completely and never would trust to eat anywhere but home again, because I believe Zizzi have taken that social freedom, once had, away,” Kazane continued, blowing the situation more out of proportion than his height-to-waist ratio. Of course, he made no comment about the numerous social freedoms Islam takes away from women… but a piece of pepperoni (and a chance to make a lot of money at the kuffar’s expense) is enough for him to complain. Being served an incorrect order at a restaurant, assuming Kazane isn’t making the whole thing up, is just something that happens. If it’s a big deal, you send the food back. But claiming it took his “social freedom” away? You’d have to be an idiot to believe that. Ancient dietary rules from a seventh-century pedophile warlord should carry no weight in the 21st century. Why anyone listens to whiners like Kazane is beyond me.

“This is not okay and Zizzi should not be allowed to get away with it,” Kazane said. “People need awareness that their service is disgraceful and very insensitive.” Disgraceful? No. Honor killings, beheadings, stoning of gays, caning of women – that’s disgraceful, as is Kazane’s attempt at winning the Muslim Jackpot. Let’s hope Kazane’s next trip to a restaurant involves heaps of bacon.