Tag Archive | Jihad

Your Daily Muslim: Ali Rashid

Your Daily Muslim: Ali Rashid

Fatass Muslim Ali Rashid, a Syrian national living in the UK, just wanted a little lovin’. Not knowing how to get laid and impeded by a mass of lard attached to his torso, Rashid waddled his way to a swimming and spa facility and tried to get his dick wet (but not by sticking it […]

Your Daily Muslim: Alla Said

Your Daily Muslim: Alla Said

Egyptian cleric Alla (not to be confused with Allah) Said is paranoid and suffers from extreme hallucinations involving global conspiracies masterminded by Jews. This psychosis has also led him to blame Jews for everything, including numerous first-world nations, the existence of gays, and World War II. “Who is the terrorist? It is the Jews who […]

Your Daily Muslim: Abu Hamizi

Your Daily Muslim: Abu Hamizi

Today’s post contains graphic descriptions of violence, including torture. Reader discretion is advised. Muslims are good at making things explode. Unlike most Muslims who like to blow up cars or their own bodies, Abu Hamizi likes to make his victims’ intestines explode – from within. The 26-year-old is an Iraqi militant who spends hours a […]

Your Daily Muslim: Ahmad Abu Quddum

Your Daily Muslim: Ahmad Abu Quddum

Waging jihad is a serious matter, and Jordanian Ahmad Abu Quddum knows the ins and outs of it. In an interview on Jordanian television, he claimed it is the duty of all Muslims to wage jihad on nations that prevent the spread of Islam, in other words, any nation that resists conquest. “Yes, [jihad] is […]

Your Daily Muslim: Muhammad Rateb al-Nabulsi

Your Daily Muslim: Muhammad Rateb al-Nabulsi

“Do you think we [Muslims] can get along with [gays’] lifestyle? This is impossible.” Syrian Islamic scholar Muhammad Rateb al-Nabullshit is yet another in a long line of Islamic homophobes that make Fred Phelps look like Perez Hilton by comparison. al-Nabullshit’s hatred of gays does not come from failed attempts at sexual experimentation – it […]

Your Daily Muslim: Assim Alhakeem (Part 2)

Your Daily Muslim: Assim Alhakeem (Part 2)

“[Homosexuality] takes all the bashfulness and good character of people and turns them into animals that seek only their sexual satisfaction through weird ways.” Sheikh Assim Alhakeem, as we learned in part 1, has a paranoid phobia of women and an irrational hatred of gays. He spends an inordinate amount of time fondling his hideous […]

Your Daily Muslim: Adam Fadli and Hassan el-Khatib

Your Daily Muslim: Adam Fadli and Hassan el-Khatib

Adam Fadli and Hassan el-Khatib came upon the Allah Sucks page one day and decided to see who could out-thug the other. They began with the typical Islamic rabid foaming, both on the page’s wall and in its inbox. After a few responses by the Allah Sucks admin team, the typical Islamic threats of harm […]

Your Daily Muslim: Abu Muwahhid (Part 2)

Your Daily Muslim: Abu Muwahhid (Part 2)

“The Qur’an is our constitution and prophet Muhammad (pigs be upon him) is our leader.” UK Islamic activist preacher Abu Muwahhid came onto my radar a couple months ago when I found his crazy ramblings on Facebook (see part 1.) If you thought what he said last time was nuts, you are in for an […]

Your Daily Muslim: Abdullah Daoud (Part 2) (DAILY DOUBLE)

Your Daily Muslim: Abdullah Daoud (Part 2) (DAILY DOUBLE)

Saudi cleric Abdullah Daoud, as we learned in part one, is a kinky mofo. He issued a fatwa saying that female babies should wear the burqa (full face veil) so they don’t invite rape. Now, he’s issued another fatwa about another one of his fetishes: young boys. (Yes, he’s Muslim, not Catholic) “It is forbidden […]